Simplifying Life for Personal Fulfillment

How to Simplify Life and Learn to Really Live

Feb 28, 2009 Carol Rzadkiewicz

All the things people accumulate and think they own control their lives, not the other way around, and this "stuff" prevents people from ever obtaining self-fulfillment.

Most people yearn to experience a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction, what Maslow termed “self-actualization,” which is the highest level of existence humans can obtain and where they finally realize their maximum potential. Most people, however, never obtain that level of being because their priorities are out of place. They value those things in life that are of the least significance, most notably worldly goods, when they should instead value, even cherish, more transient things like sunbeams dancing on morning's window, the laughter of a child, the sound of raindrops dancing on the roof, or a warm cup of cocoa sipped beside a crackling fire.

Simplifying Life for Personal Fulfillment

In Walden, Henry David Thoreau writes, “A man is rich in proportion to the number of things which he can afford to let alone” (Perkins, 1985, p. 492). He also says that human lives are “frittered away by detail,” and that the answer to this spiritual quandary is “Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity” (Perkins, 1985, p. 497).

What Thoreau is implying is that people don’t own things so much as the those things own people. In other words, all the things people accumulate— homes, yards, cars, furniture, clothing, etc— control their lives, not the other way around.

Peter Walsh (author of Enough Already!) echoes Thoreau’s message when he says that people are separated from the lives they really desire by the “stuff” they accumulate. And the question, according to Walsh, is what are people hoping for when they fill their lives with stuff (Family, 2009, p. 78)

One might argue, however, that it isn’t so much what people are hoping for as what they are trying to prove, both to themselves and to others. Aren’t people, ultimately, trying to prove they have succeeded? After all, in this materialistic world it seems that success is measured by how much “stuff” people have accumulated. Yet shouldn’t success instead be measured in terms of more intrinsic qualities, for example, by the nature of a person's relationships with other people?

So what is the answer? It’s really quite simple: People need to “de-clutter” their lives and make room for those things that really do matter.

The First Step Toward Personal Fulfillment

Walsh says that people cannot achieve inner peace if they are “in a constant state of chaos and clutter” (Family, 2009, p. 79).

So in order to rid their lives of chaos and clutter, people should take a look around and ask, “Is this really necessary?” Is it necessary to have a closet filled with clothes and shoes that are hardy ever worn? Is it necessary to have a wide-screen plasma television in every room? Is it necessary to own the latest electronic gadget, designer purse, yard ornament, hottest new toy, or trendy gizmo? Will having these things bring happiness, or will they merely fill, if only for moment, some internal void, albeit a void that can never really be filled with mere “stuff”?

Becoming the Aggressor in Achieving Personal Fulfillment

In order to de-clutter their lives, people must become the “aggressor.” They must take control of things instead of allowing things to control them. So how can this goal be accomplished? It can be accomplished when people learn to say “No” whenever they are tempted to purchase yet another electronic gadget, unnecessary household item, or frivolous doodad. They also must resist that nagging inner voice that whines, “Oh, but this is so nice. Having it will make me happy. Having it will make me somebody.”

In addition, in order to de-clutter theirlives, people must rid both themselves and their homes of those things that have already been accumulated but are no longer necessary or never have been necessar. For example, if something hasn’t been used in at least a year, they should toss it out, give it away, or donate it to charity.

Not that there won’t be times when people will be weak, especially if they have young children or grandchildren; but, overall, they should heed the words of Thoreau and do their best to simplify, simplify, simplify, and in the process, perhaps they will discover just how rich they really are.

Readers who enjoyed this article might also enjoy "The Secret of Happiness."

References:

Jenkins, G., ed. (1985) The American Tradition in Literature: Sixth Edition; New York: Random House, pp. 492,497.
Walsh, P. “Clear Your Inner Clutter”; Family Circle; New York: Meredith Corporation; April 1, 2009, pp. 78,79.

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